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// take a trip back in time

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// review – green lantern

// Not the best, but by no means the worst.

I was left with a bit of a conundrum when it came to reviewing Green Lantern. I like Ryan Reynolds, but I think he does two things well; either act super serious as he did in Buried (2010) or go comedy as in Van Wilder (2002), Adventureland (2009) or many of the other titles where he plays the loveable rogue. However, when it comes to action I think both Reynolds and the Director in charge of focusing his creativity come up against a bit of wall. Green Lantern sadly fell into the same Reynolds performance he produced in the abysmal X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) where his character Deadpool had a stop start action/slapstick feel. His latest performance is much meatier, but again the Reynolds cheeky charm feels slightly forced into this newest super hero movie.

This review, however, comes with one large caveat. I preferred Green Lantern to Captain America by a country mile…. [I’ll wait for that one to sink in]. Despite what the blogger and film reviewer community may have already said and the Rotten Tomato rating being vastly different from my opinion, I stand firm in my decision to throw out that little nugget. Here are just a few thoughts.

The mythology and etymology of Captain America is just not as interesting or fun as Green Lantern. Hal Jordan a reckless human being is called upon to join the ranks of an elite evil fighting squad and be the saviour of mankind. Personally I think this has more going for it than a genetically enhanced soldier with a conscience. That’s not to say that the story in Green Lantern isn’t a little weak, but it is at least fun. It certainly appealed to the absolute nerd in me that wants a purple alien to deliver a bad ass green ring to me.

Sadly though it has an enormous amount wrong with it. The middle section of the film really drags as we establish that Hal doesn’t think he has what it takes to save mankind and his bra straps get in a twist when his on again off again lady friend Blake Lively (Who doesn’t really add much to the film) tells him she kinda wants to Facebook poke him. The romantic parts of the narrative really should have been chopped entirely. They REALLY kill the action on-screen. I’m not sure who he is, but whoever Hal’s mate was… Get him out of there too! The best thing about being a superhero is identity protection and it appeared that the world and his wife knew about the identity of the GL. Fuck you anonymity. I guess my biggest criticism, and its one of my biggest gripes, is that there is too much chuffing CGI. I’d like to know the % of the film that WASN’T recorded in front of a green screen. I would place a bet on it being in single figures. I was also unimpressed by the length of time I has to spend staring at Reynolds’ cock outline as he demonstrated his new abilities. Get some jogger that fit Ryan!

"I've got a green ring" - I bet you have Ryan.

When the action does get going and Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard) starts smashing shit up with Parallax it’s actually good fun and has you rooting for the hero. Sadly the whole ‘I can create anything I can imagine’ concept also falls flat because Hal thinks up the worst shit imaginable. A can on roller skates? Please.

I came out of the cinema with a smile which is more than I did with Captain America and so at least you can take some satisfaction on that. It’s perhaps not worth splurging all your cash on this weekend, but it will certainly provide some entertainment when it arrives on the small screen.

Starring Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard and Mark Strong, Green Lantern arrives in Australian cinema Friday August 12. Today.

Check out the trailer here if you haven’t done so already.

Thanks for reading.

SexyRob

PLease flag up any spelling/grammatical errors. I’m too faaaarkin lazy to proofread this shit.

Have a great weekend.

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// what did you watch?

// Each week, on a Sunday, I hand the reigns of movie criticism over to you. Tell me what you saw at the Cinema or on DVD/Blu-Ray that either made your pants moist or your temperature sky-rocket due to its brilliance or whackness. If you’ve seen a movie, I want to know about it.


Your review doesn’t need to be sprawling epic like many of my reviews. it can simply be the name of the movie and a rating out of 5. It really is that easy. For example, White Chicks – the greatest movie ever made, 5/5.

For the best user submitted reviews each month, I will touch them in their trouser area or let them touch my glorious hair – enter your review and your life will change.

The bar has been set. I look forward to your responses.

Thanks for writing.

SexyRob

// what did you watch?

// Each week, on a Sunday, I hand the reigns of movie criticism over to you. Tell me what you saw at the Cinema or on DVD/Blu-Ray that either made your pants moist or your temperature sky-rocket due to its brilliance or whackness. If you’ve seen a movie, I want to know about it.


Your review doesn’t need to be sprawling epic like many of my reviews. it can simply be the name of the movie and a rating out of 5. It really is that easy. For example, White Chicks – the greatest movie ever made, 5/5.

This month, the prize will be the opportunity to have your review featured on the site. Plus if it’s really good perhaps we can make it a regular gig. Who could say no to that?!

The bar has been set. I look forward to your responses.

Thanks for writing.

SexyRob

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